Been feeling down. Since Sunday night. Those who know why, keep it a secret. For my sake. Those who dun, you probably dun need to know. Too much knowledge isn't good.
Haiz. I know i promised at least 2 people that i won't emo anymore, but i really can't help it this time. I wanted to have a good time but it turned out to be so screwed... Sometimes i wonder if anything is worth living for. Not that i'm getting sucidal thoughts or anything, but still. Sometimes life really sucks big time. I'm just gonna randomly write whatever crap that comes to my mind. And i ain't exactly in the most stable frame of mind. Not crazy, but not emotionally stable.
To quote from HSM 2 song 'Gotta go my own way'... "i get my hopes up/ and i watch them fall everytime/ another color turns to grey/ and it's just too hard to watch it all slowly fade away. Somehow it perfectly describes my not-so-perfect human emotions.
They say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. I say what doesn't kill you immediately builds up and slowly kills you over time. They say being emo is a waste of time. But then living is a waste of death. They say lying isn't good for you. But sometimes telling the truth is not much better. The truth hurts alot at times. Sometimes too much. So much that you can't bear it.
This is for someone in particular...
I'm sorry for the hurt i've caused you. I'm sorry that it turned out this way. I'm sorry that you had to suffer. I'm sorry for the wrong that i've done. I'm sorry that they found out. I'm sorry that i let them find out. I'm sorry for emo-ing. I'm sorry for everything i couldn't do.
You are my everything/ Nothing without you/ Dun wanna be without you
Without you, life's meaningless/ Darkness and despair/ Dizzying fall of misery
Ambiguity of dusk/ The brilliance of dawn/ The two of us, together.
Lots more stuff i thought of, but putting it on the blog would be SO obvious. Feel loads better. So blogging does help.
Later.
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